I think she gave up trying 2 land a bf and let herself go
You misogynist thinking that every girl wants a bf
They do. I don't appreciate u using big words idk and im gonna take offense
his electricity got shut off. i felt like a pilgrim searching for his dick.
I returned the dress. When they asked for the reason for return I said, 'I don't deserve to wear white'.
Do you know any thirteen year old jewish kids? I'm looking for a party.
We have to have sex while I'm dressed as a tiger. It's one of my life goals
I need like a hormone stopper. Or a chastity belt. Or like a lady business alarm that goes off when I'm being too drunk.
In order to see him, he made me facetime with his penis, which he had drawn a smile face on. Getting laid shouldn't be this difficult.
Whoever put salsa in the kiddie pool.....your an ass. Fuck you.
A very confused plastic surgeon just called. Apparently I called asking how much it costs to get a vodka funnel installed straight to my brain...
Yep, that just happened. My mom just gave me a big bag of drugs for my birthday. She even put them in a fancy bag with tissue paper.
Also, I have your check. Also, still wanna drop acid?
Ugh. The fucking vaginal recession is so real right now.
Is 28 too old to get fingered in Centennial Park? Asking for a friend.
I accused the cab driver of smoking weed in the taxi then I remember it was me.
I spent the entire party sexting people's significant others for them because they were too drunk to do it themselves. I did quite well too. I should start a business
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