i've got a dick and you've got a pussy....what is the problem??
i'm watching the fashion show on bravo
you're cheating on project runway?
if you can't score coke, you buy crack.
I think I sharted a yagerbomb.
Then he told me I had the most beautiful looking vulva
in the morning i found her name, number and address on one of the empty pizza boxes. also said "ps. if you find my shoes please mail to me."
Contrary to what I yelled at them last night, it turns out campus police CAN arrest people...
you were exchanging tortilla chips with the guy at the next table, telling him your table was given the "big chips" because it was your 21st birthday
I dont care if he cant spell. Illiterate people need blowjobs too
Dude, chad is laying across the room, violently, passionately, pornographicly eating something and I seriously think the 'some thing' is fighting back.
What's Spanish for "I shouldn't have worn these underwear to work?"
Now in listening to Jerome Bettis speak at the hall of fame and my boner just started twirling a terrible towel
On the bright side, only one more day until we aren't sober anymore.
They're gonna put "is a hoe" on my medical records
I was at his place until 2am. We just sat really close an stared at each other. I think you are right. Germans must not have feelings. Not even tingly ones in their pants.
Listen, I love you but you cannot refer to your dick as the holy sister anymore
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