Cool, see you soon... she just admitted to her friends that it was a queef.
there is a school bus full of santas parked in front of the liquor store
Yeah. We was talkin. Its ok. My bed is too filled with pam for sex. Its like a slip and slide of butter product.
i am doomed to only fuck guys with curved cocks
look, i dont wanna be "that girl" but if someone offers me coke in exchange for sex, i cant say no.
i'm not sure when it happened but apparently now it's topless bar night, im wearing a leotard and everyone is looking at me like i'm cheating.
He had me believing he was actually British until he came and used his real voice.
I need to think of the best way to tell this boy he's not getting his pants back
We smoked bowls and watched Cops for what seemed like hours. And yet I know I'll go back.
I just formed the "shit on a tree in Chicago club." And I feel awful about it.
Did I, at any point last night, say I was dying?
Safe to say we should stock up on nipple bandaids ladies
Best neighbors ever! They found the guy ive been wanting as a booty call and got me invited to the party the guy was at and gave me alcohol so i could be tipsy when met him. im never moving.
I'm noticing I drink less and do fewer lines when I do both together.
Now that's what I call smart money management.
Reverse road head. Sa-witch!!!
Randomize
