After last night I still want u
But please keep that on the DL
And I just remember seeing him for the first time and being like, who is this ape of a man? Like legit he could be the missing link
i wish my apartment had room service that i didn't have to pay for.
he literally just asked me which v neck he should wear tomorrow.
they started a semi-successful rumor that toby keith died. who says fraternities don't have goals
I just realized I have my pepper spray, gun, and vibrator all in one drawer. One false grab and I'm screwed either way.
I use him for alcohol and he uses me for sex. This is the closest thing to love i could imagine
She took a break from repeating "my face is still buzzing!" to say that the phantom of the opera could be here
No, the real question is if you drink like I drink why WOULDN'T you wear a cape.
I'm way too hungover for life right now
But you put your finger in my ass and the rest is history
So you think Jesus would be proud of me for walking of shame into my apartment 10 minutes before I told my parents I'd be over for Easter?
I probably would do him if given the chance but how awkward would Bible study be after that.
Now after not puking, next step is not to do the accent when immigration says "hello."
You were filing your nipples with a nail file to "make them sharper"
Randomize
