I think the boy in my gender studies class cried when 90% of the girls said they had faked an orgasm
that's the last time we turn jepordy into a drinking game.
The freshman sure do fuck up the whataburger line at 2am
hanging out with you guys is like living the wikipedia entry for drugs...not sure i can handle that tonight.
random memory from the wedding, the bartender show us how to open the windows of the hotel and pee out of them
This is love.
Which part? The alcoholic cupcakes or the lesbian st paddys day party?
you were trying to convince me that you weren't drunk by grabbing my shoulders, looking deeply into my eyes and saying "i can see your sparkle"
I think I ruined his life by managing to get his initiation nickname for his frat to be "Whiskey Dick" but I still wish herpes on him and his fugly new girlfriend.
Atlanta road trip update. Jimmy fell into the petting tank at the aquarium. And freaked out. With cops now... Keep you posted
I just told the toilet I loved it. Bad sign.
2012 needs to end already. I've exceeded my quota for People Who Have Accidentally Seen My Tits.
Can you please help mom and dad? Theyre trying to figure out Skype, and its like 2 cavemen finding fire.
How is it possible for someone who gets so many dick picks sent to her, to be experiencing such a complete and utter lack of dick IRL.
I'm worried my dog collar isn't going to come in time. I might be trying on dog collars at PetSmart next week. That could get awkward.
sober me needs to have more faith in drunk me.
Randomize
