Drinking mikes hard & watching the swan princess. i fucking LOVE college
you took him to the bathroom with you to pee and told him he had to hold your hand..but he couldn't turn on the lights because you didnt want him to hear you peeing..and still got laid. i wish i had your life.
I JUST WANT SOMEBODY TO EXPLAIN HOW FORESKIN WORKS AND DO NOT UNDERSTAND WHY THIS IS A PROBLEM.
All of my current injuries can be related back to sex.
Lesson learned. Never get fingered on an airplane.
you got me arrested i just think that goes without question you owe me a blowjob
I brought a guy home then decided no. Took him back to the bar and said "I'm going to drop you where I found you. Have fun"
The one time my sister did shrooms she thought she was thumbalina. I can't live my life that way
Thanks for coming over. I'm sorry everyone else was vomiting. Thank you for not vomiting. I love you.
Btw I did not technically have a dick in me but I was naked in bed with a man during the last finals game so that is why the Warriors won
I just put vagisil on my bug bites how do you think my morning is going
Over 14,000 people at my school and the kid I went home with last night is IN MY FUCKING LECTURE
You're just upset because I have cupcakes and boobs and you don't.
Anyway, that's been my evening- crying and looking up diabetes symptoms. How was your night?
it was like 6 shots in and he was automatically my type
Randomize
