I reminded them that I didn't puke and I cleaned yours up! So huh!
i'm so desperate for a drink right now i looked up the recipe to make pruno
i was puking in the toilet, he walked in and to talk to me and started puking in the sink.. Could this be my perfect man??
IM INA KID IN KING ATURHTS CUNT!
A Kid In King Arthur's Court? Like the movie?
CUNT. CUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUNT
McDonalds has hash browns for only a quarter!....how many u want?
All of them
apparently the officer said last night, "son, why don't you do yourself a favor and spread your legs so you don't keep vomiting on them". why can't I remember those nights?!
She was wearing a "Got Beer" hat and your bed had necco wafers all over it the next morning. Another story for the grandkids.
I'm way too horny to be at work right now. I think it might be legally irresponsible to leave me alone with cucumbers.
If I wanted to fuck someone, I'd go for John. I'm meeting Bryan cuz I wanna get to know him better. And eventually fuck him. But not this Tuesday.
He told me that "my little fuckpig" was a term of endearment in Britain. I think I'm in love.
And then. You beer bonged 3 tall boys. In a row. Fell into some kids lap. And pulled down my shirt trying to get up. Thank you for that. I got laid
Ok if you are accepting my apology, please continue to ignore me. If you are not, please fill out the brief survey that follows, to help me improve my people relations: a) your a bitch please leave me alone b)your crazy pls leave me alone c) I never cared ab u please leave me alone. D) all of the above e) all of the above but I wouldn't mind still fucking u. F) who are you again? Your answer will not b shared and will b used in accord. With the law. TY
So how much of last night are we going to pretend never happened? Enough to stay friends?
I CAN CONTROL MY GERBIL WITH MY BREATH. HE FOLLOWS THE SMELL. PROBABLY WOULDNT BE AS EXCITING IF I WASNT HIGH OFF MY ASS, BUT STILL
At least your nickname is not Plunge Slut and that nickname is not in a published thesis work
Randomize
