do you know mcdonalds refuses to give out large cups of water now? you have to buy a bottle or they give you a small cup. No exceptions.
RUDE.
I said FINE, then I'd like 7 small waters and 2 of those nifty carrying cases to carry about my h2o.
outsmarted mickey deeeees
So.. my mom just told me she hasn't gotten laid in 7 years... I'm really disturbed.. at the same time... At least now I know why shes so damn cranky all the damn time
Please don't tell me you're asking me to have sex with your mother.
I wish you wouldn't refer to your breast milk as "ammunition"
you only had a canadian ten, but you said it was all good cuz you would just by molson.
Just come over and take your pants off. 35 mins tops. You'll be home before midnight cinderella
My wrist bandage is guacamole stained. What an accurate representation of my life as a whole
He told me since I'm into organics I should know his meat is known locally for its quality and hes hand raised it since age 13.
I feel like it'll be a success as long as she doesn't end up dead in a ditch. There has to be a line somewhere.
When he wears his hair down and sandals, he looks like Jesus. A Jesus I would fuck.
That's not what Jesus is for
I just dumped bong water and Bacardi out of my purse into the trash can. Everything in my purse is soaked. I hate Sundays.
Think of all the island guys I could have. Ah well.
You can not bait me into a "how Stella got her groove back" call and response.
You yelled to anyone that tried to help you "I have a burrito, what else could a girl want?"
he has the ass of a greek god and he made me breakfast
He paid for a 5 star hotel suite and I raided the mini bar after he left. I think that’s bad karma. Want some pringles?
Some bitch is passed out in a pool of vomit. Fucking lightweight, it's only 8.30.
Oh, wait.. That's you.
Randomize
