her nose should be used as a dorsal fin
I'm starting therapy this week.. Taylor Swift music isn't cutting it for me anymore
Look what our sorority has done to us...we're hitting on girls in hopes of getting an awesome little.
Show him your tits if he says no
They're not help-me-out-of-jams tits. They're I-fake-people-into-thinking-they-look-good tits.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I just want to let you know that when you try and lie about the "solid 10" you brought home last night, I've got a picture of her and about 10 reasons you should have left her at the bar starting with those martin scorsese eyebrows.
If I win the contest of drinking the most water I get a chicken nugget.
Drinking Patron always ends with me puking or receiving anal. So make your move when I start ordering it.
Hey, I'm renting a storage locker for the summer to keep all my bondage shit in so my parents don't see it. You wanna split on it for your all your weed shit?
I am in an eBay bidding war over a build a bear one direction tshirt, this is who you choose to bone
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
tom claimed she had a star tattooed around her buttonhole. i am not prepared for this era of skankyness
I just tinder matched with a blue angels pilot. I need to make out with him. For America.
All this studying of HIV makes me want to have sex with you.
Is it too far to say to someone "you're useless for everything besides sex"
I walked in..crop dusted the whole place then asked her if she wanted to go to a place that smells better.
You were always a thinker
The sex was so good we high-fived after.
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