opening your purse in class to grab a pen only to find dollar bills and pink fuzzy handcuffs instead...that's a cool feeling
Too late, the blunt's already in my cleavage
you should give me head with plastic fangs in
24 hours later and my vagina is still tingling. That good.
Had sex on a washing machine in a pool of beer. Can you say success.
Like if there was an award for best way to take a girls virginity, he would get a standing ovation. And first prize. Probably a bunch of roses too. That good.
I bet. I bought a surfboard and a kite and filled my camelback with vodka-tonics. Let's do this
Waking up to find your mom holding your birth control pills and telling you I suggest you take this
An don't say it's "personal preference" cause I don't buy it. I just want to have normal cool guy balls. I don't want to be the dude that's still rocking the equivalent of the "mid 90's bowl cut" of scrotum haircuts.
WHAT IS WRONG WITH YOU
MANY MANY THINGS AND MOST OF THEM ARE YOUR FUCKING FAULT
I am naked and annoyed.
Well I've consulted some psychics but they keep saying all they hear in my head is screaming and all they see in my future is pool noodles and cheese dip?
Guess who just hooked up with a guy who was wearing a shirt from his mom's "dress up closet"?!
dude it's 9am and i'm still drunk it's too early for sexting
You're not who I thought you were. You've changed.
i gave head in a cab last night. get on my level.
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