i guess when we were done i grunted "unforgiveable" and walked out.
If you're wondering about the pepper everywhere its for the ants and it was my doings. They hate pepper. You're welcome.
Last night I texted her to confirm she could start designing costumes for my show this week.
That is one convoluted booty call.
Come my child we shall walk thru the pasture of amazing sex and corndogs. Hint:some corndogs are not corndogs.
Dude, i don't know. I don't remember anything after we started chanting/playing "shot of gin."
Guess what I signed up for?!?!?!
Please tell me you're not selling your eggs.
Yeah, I fucked him. and the worst part is his name was Jesus. And nobody said it in Spanish. Just Jesus. There is no way I can avoid burning when I walk into a church from now on.
So I bet a guy he could drink two irish car bombs faster than me and I lost. now he gets to name our first son. sory.
So I may have to sleep with a cougar to get a slightly used, yet free microwave. I'm going in
Somehow I became in charge of getting my mother laid? This can't be my life? Lol
The orgasm I got from him made me feel almost as good as I imagine the girls in the tampon commercials feel.
Christ I forgot how flexible you need to be for a decent sext pic. Jesus.
I just tried to snap you a picture of the CVS where we decided not to become parents.
My "birthday sex" consisted of approximately 25 seconds of him going down on me in the shower.
I'm too depressed to drink my wine. That is what I would call a serious problem
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