It's not littering; it's giving birds nest building suplies. Besides, birds love soy sauce and plastic forks.
You smell like stripper and shame
you would have Pina Colada flavored saliva.
can a guy be partially circumsized? cause i dont exactly know what i was lookng at...
I wish that vaginas would just grow when you're ready for sex. Like when you dont need your vagina its not there, but when you need it...BAM its there. then no one would see it when you get drunk
yeah...or you could just stop doing cartwheels in skirts
I just masterbated while imagining him getting hit by a truck. I have hit a completely unacceptable level of anger & bitterness. Help.
I walked home with an awkward asain couple. There was a language barrier but I think we're friends now.
the back of my hand read, "say no to drugs." my palm read, "say yes to shots." when the fuck did I write that?
Passing out is my livers way of protecting my mind.
Drinking hard cider in a room full of freshman girls. Never felt so secure of my manhood
I probably wouldn't
I feel as though I look like a mom with a substance abuse problem
starting to feel like a fuck wizard with a magical sixth sense for people fucking.
She turned down sex for beer pong. I'm not sure if I should be disappointed or not.
While she was pissing on the neighbors shrubs, they threatened to call the cops...she mumbled 'don't threaten me with a good time", so to answer your question, yes she was drunk.
Something is wrong here. The birds are chirping and I'm not fucking you, I'm not getting head and I don't smell bacon. Why am I up this early then?
Randomize
