Haha dude youd die if you were here. Girl presenting is defending the new testament and did her report on JESUS. best believe i'm gonna ask some hungover, atheist ass questions
Just spent five minutes taking pictures of my hands for some random guy.
Thanks for reminding me why I talk about you behind your back. Get laid.
What the fuck. The girl next to me just looked at her phone, put her stuff away, and popped a birth control and ran out of class. Lucky fucking guy.
he kept telling me that god made these magical balloons called condoms
Why is there blood and lettuce everywhere?
He kept coming back from the bar with hotter girls and just left with two...I feel like I just witnessed something amaZing. Like meeting Jesus and finding out he has no morals either
Well this lady at the bar told me I was a natural on the tambourine and that it was my God given talent. and then she gave me a tambourine.
Just you wait I'll be crying and puking everywhere in no time
All of the texts in my phone just say "BEER". I woke up with glowsticks on my arm. What happened last night?
I can't let him end my perfect streak. HE USED TO BE FAT
He didn't get laid that weekend.. and that is honestly an accomplishment for the rest of us.
Turns out he has a 6pack too. Alright adorable snapchatting manwhore dude, you win.
I witness him finger a girl behind the dj decks yet I'm still going to meet up with him. Wtf is my life
BRING THE BAGELS
If I take a couple more shots I won't even know he's a Mormon that drives a motorcycle
Randomize
