i may or may not have a boner. what are your thoughts
And i was thinking, 'i'm happy to be underneath you, but i wish you weren't doing THAT.'
Random 1st period thought: do you think she could put "had a threesome" on her resume?
omfg. get on facebook. the science olympiad team had a rave.
he aimed his bare ass at the sparkler, farted, and it really did work...i love 4th of july anal fire works
He's trying to get everyone in the bathtub for a team meeting about how we're gonna find his car. Which is parked outside. Think we should cut him off?
Found out why they call her Halfpipe Jenny-NOT the cool reason we thought
My professor just used the phrase "balls deep in your mind". My day is officially made.
We broke up in downtown Nashville with drunken, blow up penis waving bachelorette parties walking by. For some reason I can see this ending up as a country music video.
He insists on falling asleep with his penis between my buttcheeks. He says its his "home".
It blows my mind that pandora doesn't have an : I want to lay in bed in the dark and be sad and cold and eat frozen mangos and chipotle all day station
Look, if a guy shows up at your house. He's short, name is Logan, has weird vertical hair, let him in, give him food, and a place to stay. He's on a ver important mission. And I am he. as he is me and we are all together. And we are the eggman, goo goo gajoob.
I've run into almost every guy I've ever slept with today. It's like they know just how horny I am.
I didn't know it was possible and I don't know if I'll ever be able to do it again on my own but he literally fuck me sideways.
she prefaced telling me she was pregnant with "houston, we have a problem"
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