Pretty sure I just has te same conversation as you. He suggested I get, sell, and fuck the hoes, and once all was said and done, that I should refer afforementioned hoes to him, to perform felatio.
i feel like a lion cub that has been breast fed for years, and mom has left, and now i have to learn how to hunt on my own
At dinner I grabbed his hand and he screamed "mom she just grabbed my penis" the proceeded to shove my hand down his pants! Hello Mr.Dick!
This is so stupid. Now I have to call the party planner and tell her that the break up party is off. They decided to get back together.
So I have the professor convinced that the textbook will take another week to deliver. that should give me enough time to replace the cash i spent on strippers.
I plan on gettn treatment center drunk
Imagine that my comprehension level is that of a 7 year old and explain your plan again
They never prepare you for how broke ur gonna be in college. I just accepted money from two underage girls at a gas station to buy them beer only because I'm trying to figure out a way to run off with it without them noticing.
Dude, use it to buy them beer. Then run the beer to ur car as fast as you can and bring it to the party. Seriously, we're running out of booze over here
Apparently it's bring your ugly annoying ass piece of shit slob of a baby day at work
omg he is no good in bed, bless his little heart and his big dick
I think the blind guy i flirt with on a regular basis is starting to realize he's old enough to be my father. I can't tell if he's into it or not.
NO FUCKBOY SHALL PASS OPERATION #BITCHMODE HAS SUCCEEDED
What am I thankful for..I figured out I can drink on antibiotics without getting sick thanks to the power of pot gummies
We could just stay sober.
No! We tried that once.
It sucked.
so idk what that means but now because of me he has a police file as breaking into my apartment and sleeping in my hallway under the carpet
Randomize
