My balls are about to become a huge part of your mouth's life
can't decide if i want to get drunk or coked for this harry potter thing.. it is kind of long
aren't you going with children?
So i literally just wrote sorry on my quiz and turned it in.
He walked in AS I was cumming. Now even my father knows I'm a squirter.
I cannot believe how calm you were last night about telling Katie she was on fire.
All I did this weekend was get my life in order. I feel like I wasted my time.
There's sex hanging in the air like a pinata. European people are no joke.
Who knew drunk me could climb a 17 story building for apple juice and sex
I fell on my face, puked, and had to be rocked to sleep in a hammock. I'd say Europe is a success
You ghosted you're own booty call. Wow what a sad sad man.
Someone just said “I need to use up this money before I’m tits up under the dirt” so I think I’m going to start using that in my daily vocabulary.
We havent had power for three days. What else is there to do besides drink and fuck? I thought that was obvious.
I haven't lost it. I know I'm not a prophet. It was a joke.
After the edible you claimed you were talking to my cat. We're in our 30s now, what was once cute is now a liability.
Just ordered a pregnancy test off amazon. Fuck 2019
I remember you banged her while I was dying on your couch, so good call
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