her nipple to breast ratio was just odd
I wanted to google "huge banana" but I'm pretty sure all I'd get is dick pictures.
Tell me the dirtiest joke you know
Sarah Palin
god, I love you
i realized our last day of finals is on cinco de mayo....it's god's way of saying drink ridiculous amounts of tequila and wear sombreros
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Man, i was looking at the pictures i took last night in one i was on the Kentucky line fist pumping with a hobo..wth happened?
As soon as he lost the election, the reception's open bar became a cash bar. I have never been so disappointed in my countrymen.
Yeah dude, it's amazing. Be careful though, that shit is really really intense. Like it's way more intense than normal shit...
I took two and feel like crushed diamonds spread over glazing marmalade
I wish you could be here to assess my herpes before he gets here.
I just conducted a skype meeting drunk and in the middle of a cornfield. I don't even think they noticed.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
OMG. Dad just threw a 100 dollar bill down on the table for a girl to lift her shirt. I think he was kidding, but...
I haven't even had my coffee yet and you're being slutastic
YOU CAN'T GET A TATTOO BECAUSE OF KPOP FANFICTION. THAT'S NOT HOW LIFE WORKS
Doug the spinning teacher gave me chlyamdia
Did you actually just quote Ace Ventura during a sext!?
You know it
Dammit now I have to marry you
Don't tell me I can do whatever makes me happy while also saying I have to put on pants.
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