your thong is hanging out like whoa
I just beat off to a cartoon porn video. what has my life come to
He dated me before I started drinking. I feel like he deserves a consolation bj for all the effort he had to put in to get in my pants.
All I know is that if a letter starts with "I'm aware you jerked off in the bathroom last night," I don't want to finish reading it.
At least the cops kept you away from sleeping with her. Protect and Serve.
She's locked herself in the bathroom with a tub of icecream and she's watching my little pony on her phone. We know it cause she sings with them.
i saw the poster for your lost tequila... what a shame
This guys mom bought us a 24 pack and drove me and 8 others to a frat house... Hello moms weekend.
There's a person in my phone named motor boat. I love making new friends.
The guy at the ER said it was the first time he's given stitches for a funneling accident. Then he seemed upset that I took pride in that...
she basically told me that her vine videos last longer that I do
He went to cum on my stomach and somehow it got behind my ear. He's like a fucking jizz Houdini.
Lol yeah. Because I just woke him up to blow him for being hot.
Is it weird that I was turned on when he told me he had a vasectomy?
I knew you two would hit it off
if you and your penis don't hurry up, I'm getting drunk without you.
Randomize
