If it were my dying wish, would you come over 2nite 2 save me?:):):) wana come anyways?
wow wtf my bar tab was 80 dollars
IT WAS DOLLAR BEER NIGHT
Sex on a kitchen table is not as amazing as they make is seem in the movies.
I mean, he's dancing back and forth between pathetically sad and massively fucking creepy.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
The dutch village is so much worse hungover. Fuck them and their wooden shoes.
this crazy girl in up in Dennys is going crazy because Bob Saget just texted her.
I'm sitting in the drive through at Mcdonalds right now watching the workers pressure wash the vomit I left from last night.
it was either a really good one night stand or a really really good first date. thank you online dating
How do you feel about fucking me quick and then me leaving to go do arts and crafts?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Let's go get our ovaries removed together. It'll be like bonding by getting mani/pedis, but with more vicodin and less unwanted pregnancies.
Things bear mace does not do: repel bears. Things bear mace does do: piss off bears, give bystanders asthma attacks. Lesson learned
We got kicked out of Walmart for playing cod with squirt guns of course it was better then prom.
Can we put this graduation on the shelf figuratively and go drink
I just showered and shaved both ankles and one knee because that's the skin that's exposed in the jeans I'm wearing today. Please tell me I'm not the only one who does that.
i asked your drunk ass where the fuck you were going and you screamed “WENDY’S BITCH”.
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