So thats when I found out ur supposed to put the penut butter on your balls not your dogs balls, feels alot better
Sorry about teling your dad i'd have sex with him last night in front of your mom while i was drunk
does it bother you that i swallowed like millions of your unborn children
actually, i try not to think about it
and i pooped them out
did you violate me with a mr sketch marker when i passed out? i just peed and wiped purple and it smelled like grape. i need to get to the bottom of this...
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I wonder if they've ever made a porno about the song "she'll be comin' round the mountain when she comes"
she said her black crocs were her 'dress up crocs'
It's not prostitution until you're out of college. Right now it's just strategic boning.
I told him he was, quote: "A big cuddly bear" and he needed to get into my bed or I would set his Golden Retriever free.
trying to figure out what happened last night by looking around the apartment.
naked man under the piano. THE PLOT THICKENS.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
She'll feel so accomplished if she finally gets to bang me.
Before consuming her Waffle House she did a few deep breaths and cleared the table to "prepare herself for this"
I just squirted in your honor. It's like pouring one out for the beautiful sex partnership that could have been
There's no such thing as shame in your world, is there?
I have 2 voicemails from u last night. one of them is just 5 min of u saying "doodling"...
You told everybody that you were a dragon and then projectile vomited all over the kitchen.
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