I don't understand why some guys want to have a huge conversation while standing at the urinal with cock in hand...
He’s a liberal pot smoker and perfect for me. He invented a game where we have to smoke a joint every time you hear a Middle Eastern accent on NPR.
Just figured out how to smoke weed with a toaster.
He was actually able to throw up in the bucket from the top bunk. im impressed.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
she just took adderol and chased it w dog water
he broke up with her mid blow job, and somehow convinced her to finish. I want his life
I just made an agreement with this milf to shoot her daughters wedding in exchange for blow jobs. Going pro was the best choice I ever made.
I feel like this has turned into my work. But if I get paid sitting under a desk, that's perfectly fine with me.
The guy at the door just stared only at my boobs and said "I'm gonna let you in." 'Merica
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
People don't tend to fuck with you when they think you have someone else's blood on your face
You are in a fancy European city. The best way to truly experience the city is through Tinder
All I've done today is nap, eat candy and get off from my vibrator. I didn't know it was possible to be THIS single.
Cooked. Eating pizza. Didn't have a napkin so I took my shirt off and I'm using it.
I CAN'T FALL IN LOVE WITH SOMEONE WHO HAS A LISP. I JUST CAN'T.
I'm at work behind the bar and just washed my mouth out with rumple bc I don't have a toothbrush. This may be a new low.
Randomize