Who said anything about talking that was a booty call
Phease come get me i thought i was in a place i don't even understand
let me know it goes. try not to get bit. and if you can, get someone to videotape it.
The girl next to me in class is taking notes on woman's suffrage with a girls gone wild pen.
There is a limo involved. Man up, and make yourself puke. Its only one more night of blacking out.
what kind of one night stand wants to walk you home in the morning? whole diff kind of walk of shame.
Youre the drunk baby that everyone wants to take care of.
I can't wait till they start promoting the testiciplasty. Turn those old prunes into fresh tight kiwis!
Did you catch one of my beer pong balls in your cleavage or was that a dream?
well he said my boobs made him believe in love at first sight so that's cool
Today I learned that when you lick a mans butthole, you get wined and dined at a nice french restaurant.
I dunno what's worse, that one guy here said he'd blow somebody for Tim Horton's right now, or that someone else looks like they want to test his sincerity.
Come get me, I'm fucking scared.
I've amended my previous statement: I'm not allowed to put in my two weeks till I ask out the waitress. Now I have motivation on two levels
i found 4 slices of pizza in my toaster, and a can of unopened soup in my blender.. wtf?
1st date with cop went weird. He yelled at me & we had a horrible date. Walking to the car I tripped & started bleeding & then he made out with me. Is it wrong that I want to see him again?
THIS IS WHY YOU NEED THERAPY!
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