yes i saw that this morning. it was my mailbox.
The pink midgets playing hockey is the EXACT reason cold meds and alcohol do not mix. Period.
I know its small, but please -- stop calling it my "weenis".
And that's when I found out that Patrick wasn't in fact down with O.P.P.
I would really like to get high with Bill Nye. I'm being dead serious. Every step I take is literally a step I take because it will take me closer to Science Guy high.
We could get him to build Inspector Gadget.
I didn't know you were high TOOOO!!!
when did my "fat clothes" just become my clothes...diet starts tomorrow
tequila makes me forget i have legs
What I dont get, is for a man with a penis his size, to choose to go back with another girl instead of one that he says is the best sex he's ever had. He cant afford to be picky.
I Apparently saved a picture of the Eiffel tower in between 2 pics of his dick. It appears to be the same size. I fucking love Paris.
I don't talk to her anymore. I lit her birthday presents on fire. Who the fuck puts candles that close to tissue paper?
if things do not go as planned you should see me walking down I81 blindfolded and pantless
Homeboy was juggling while taking bong rips. Of course he got laid.
My mom just invited me to come with them on their honeymoon to Mexico this summer. And I got a Bump-It in my stocking.
Pass the awkward sauce please.
I'm drowning in it here
her mom went out of her way to book us a room with separate beds... her level of gay denial is in beast mode
You opened the door to your apartment and shrieked "THE CHAIR IS GONE!" then punted a bag of votive candles
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