What are these yellow papers in the kitchen?
These are the tickets we got last night.
Did i sign this one as Grizzly Bear?
Yes...yes you did.
I tried watching the view, i got through 8 minutes. That is probably a world record.
They always sound like a bunch of chickens.
I think you're the first person to ever call Louisville, KY a "romantic getaway".
its not a party unless mikie exposes himself
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Well I'm 2 for 2 with the absinthe, I just woke up in some random car behind the bar
I picked the lock on the bathroom door and sang him a song while he pooped. Why is he mad?
This baby is an asshole
She made this little rubber cap thing that looks like a brain to go on my dick. She calls it a "penis cap". Industrial design students are weird...
I remember him going "OH SHIT" when he saw you straddling me on the table. And it was like the best feeling ever.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I just wish he'd leave so I can vomit in peace.
The first guy I ever sexted is having a baby.. Is this what adulthood feels like?
You're breaking my sexual little heart
is it sad that a disney movie is making me horny?
Word. I want it involving like... sing-a-longs and sniffing glue.
There’s so much sex at the hospital I’m beginning to think scrubs were invented to make duty booty easier
Randomize