Note to self: never go down on a girl first thing in the morning…its like opening a grilled cheese sandwich
she was throwing up and singing "I HAD a feeling that tonight was going to be a good good night." And yeah she was still in her dress.
you refused to come out of the bathroom until i asked you in spanish
Best friends brother. Beat that.
just to let you know coffee and vodka was a bad way to start the day
No joke. Last we saw of him he was naked and dragging that stupid goat into the bushes.
I understand where he's coming from but I don't want this alcohol to revolve around relationship
Wait
The last time I thought I had a UTI, I ended up having herpes. Sooo.. This time in preparing myself for cancer or death.
We could all 3 jump out of a cake in just tophats. A true marble cake.
I only see on penis in this picture but I assume there is another lurking out of sight.
Yes... I'll kill two birds with one crazy ecstacy filled night.
Well I've consulted some psychics but they keep saying all they hear in my head is screaming and all they see in my future is pool noodles and cheese dip?
Woke up with a padlock locked onto my ear gauge and the first of many sticky note clues on my chest leading to the key.
You're up at 3AM, right? I have a very important question.
You know the Wendy's on route 6, by Kohls? Do you know if it has a drive through?
Yes it does.
I'm not fucking you with a Stormtrooper helmet on!
Randomize
