But i did once see a show where a women was homeless and installed a stove in a school bus so she and her baby could live there since all the seats were taken out. As far as being homeless goes it didn't look half bad...So this is me promising to you that if i ever am living in an abandoned school bus...i will at least pimp it out with a stove so you can come over for dinner sometimes
It must have been true love
I don't call true love eating a bag of doritos and then going down on each other
I am no longer a man. I just realized I prefer Spongebob to college football.
Some guy on the train just glared at me. So I'm drinking tequilla out of a dixie cup. Go fuck yourself.
My 54 year old father just sent me a YouTube link on my school email titled "Walrus sucks his own dick" and then wrote in the email "I wish I were a walrus". What the fuck is wrong with my family?
you know you made some mistakes when your last two boyfriends are both obsessed with women's curling...
she must've caught on when i went out for a "run" in jeans and a sweatshirt and came back holding a McDonalds bag and smelling like pot.
Just walked by a group of guys calling out walks of shame with a mega phone from their front porch.
Jus posted an album so big that it takes my manhood into question
Hhahaha he is. Omg the new polish friend just took his pants off in front of me. There is something wrong with this nationality.
you know you have a brother who cares when he hands you a piece of pizza before you pass out from too many bong hits
My sister hid me from my parents, brought me a bloody mary, and told my girlfriend I was out with my dad. For 13, I got to say she's working out pretty good.
guy next to me on the train just pulled out two bottles of gin and a block of cheddar. is slowly making his way through all of them.
OH MY GOD I AM DYING. AS I WAS TEXTING I JUST BUMPED INTO A MOTHER FUCKING DEER. I AM SHAKING
Wait...Literally? You hit a deer...with your body?!
I PHYSICALLY RAN INTO IT. I FELT ITS WEIRD HAIR AND I EVEN APOLOGIZED CAUSE IT DINDT REGISTER THAT IT WASNT A PERSON. MORTIFIED.
Opening my shipments of mascara and nipple pasties this morning like a boss bitch
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