Do u have any bacon or vodka by chance
you used to get mad at me for mentioning 'unprotected sex' and happenings in my bed
well yeah, but then i realized the wisdom of your ways.
bad idea #53- masterbating while on period.
I told him to go down on me and when he did he started crying!! I asked him why and he said my vag looked just like his ex girlfriends!!!
the sex was "jacking off to playboy" bad.
can we get together and have a vodka water gun fight? i need to get som intense excersise/alcohol
WHAT KIND OF DUMPSTER DOESNT HAVE PIZZA IN IT?
You were such a shitshow...I was just standing in the kitchen eating my toaster strudel and you came in, whispered "you didn't see anything" and led him to the couch
Also his beard was very delicious looking. I wanted to touch it so bad, but I held back.
Sorry about all of the penis things that happened last night.
But idk if I cried about life then banged him or banged him and then cried. Chicken or the egg?
Gonna be late for work. Sex comes first. Priorities.
so the casino kicked my ass last night, i'm pretty sure i hit a new level of hungover....just showered with my sunglasses on because the bathroom light is too bright
Lol. I liked you the most when we were banging random girls and trying to tag team everything. You were happier then.
Sextember may be over, but Cocktober is just beginning!!!
Randomize
