if you're gona send my txt to that site at least change my area code plz
You know, I didn't realize this at the time, but it appears that I am being "heavily petted" by 3 grown men in that pic.
If these were biblical times then you'd be a Roman Senator.
Hey Operation Dumbo Drop... FYI, when you select your date this evening, our doorway is 3'x7'
I didn't know it was possible to make picking up dog shit look sexy.
She did the bend and snap...
25 Odd Things These Pathetic People Do For Enjoyment
I mean we havent seen each other since december and then bam its cinco de mayo and were having sex under a life guard tower taking tequila shots between each position. no big deal
Why's my alcoholism being used to prove a point?
I havnt even moved into my new place yet and there's already a county sheriffs card taped to the door with my name on it asking me to call him
im gonna make a bucket list just so i can cross off "underwater blowjob"
So roofie roulette was a success but I'm a little worried that the 2 who got the tainted beer still haven't contacted anyone...
The Most Iconic Met Gala Looks The Kardashian’s Have Rocked
She was so morning drunk she asked the lady at brueggers for a bandaid and my self respect back
Perfect. Let's do that. I'm thinking everclear and green dye as our base. We shud start from there
You came home And decided to make beer battered bacon... That's why there was smoke
I'm sorry, that really sucks. I'm in the bath eating lasagna and if anyone comes in here it's going to be bad news for them
Your final is gonna be as easy for you as getting into straight girls' pants is for me.
do you think there's enough of the fabric you gave me to make a crop top for a cat?