Viking lives by an ancient code of honor that we do not understand.
What code could that possibly be? Bothering the fucking shit out of people while being physically repulsive?
cant help it. i get a boner every time that shake weight infomercial comes on
So after tequila Thursday, Jess broke her arm table dancing. Now her and Andrew look like the perfect drunk couple, matching casts and all.
I need to sleep with 3 more guys by midnight to meet my 2010 resolution..
The only thing that made me get out of bed this morning was knowing that tonight, I don't plan on remembering what happened today
I just found a wine bottle in my shower. Must have been a good night.
im like basted in vodka, i went tanning and it was like i was an alcoholic turkey being cooked in a locker of doom
Hahah what did you even say to him?!
That I was gonna inflate his vagina with a leaf blower?
Oh.
All I remember is grabbing a random guys dick at the bar and him just saying thank you and us taking a shot together
We just got busted fucking in the hammock by his roommate...I'm so out of here as soon as hes asleep....
He told me was "pretty like the wife in some movie where the husband is a cheater." I think I'm gonna fuck him.
I'm going to confession for the first time in 6 years. Where do I start, the gay sex or rampant alcoholism?
I broke another vibrator the other day. Abstinence is not for me.
I paid for lunch, then he made a bunch of holes in my wall and destroyed my bathroom.
outside on the street drinkin, walked into a random house and asked to pee, some kid hands me a beer and says i have to chug it first
Randomize
