But honestly u used to be a cool guy and lately uve been superame(734): Superlame
3 inches of snow, below zero windchill and i just saw a dude in a wrangler with no doors, shorts a beanie and burton snow goggles. God i love college in colorado
This lady in my dui class just asked what patron was. I feel like she doesn't belong here
After walking in on us in the living room, he still insisted that he slept in my bed with me afterwards.
He just referred to his foreskin as a snuggie. Help.
check off brunette on the list of girls tht hit me with there cars and then fucked me later
I need to shotgun another beer. Where's the machete?
I found out his name. Apparently we sat in the shower together and flooded the bathroom.
Morning yack off the fire escape. Girl walking by was mortified. Gooooooooo Ducks!!
I want to be you.
I renamed his cat Jeff last night. Well I spray painted it on him.
I dunno what the deal was, but you spent about an hour trying to put your phone charger in the outlet and you were yelling "one plug to rule them all"
Though my hair looks fantastic i will unfortunately have to turn down your 4am sex offer
Yeah, I got home from work at like 9:30, and he was passed out on the couch wearing only a tee shirt and The Jurassic Park theme on repeat.
My mom just asked if I've gotten any girls pregnant how is your day going
i hooked up with all four beatles on halloween get on my level
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