I am going to be in the room whjen you have your first child and spit on its face before its even all the way out of you.
no, I didn't make it. Instead, i watched VH1 for... 13 hours? I use the question mark because I was using Flavor Flav's clocks to tell time after the first 3 hours.
Was this before, or after you took my brand new bag of shredded cheese, and "Made it rain"?
It'll be like the burning bush except without moses and with pubes.
Hey to make you feel better about last night, I just shit my pants.
Dude. It's not even nine. I don't know yet.
Drink number four. Don't even tell me about its not even nine
He is into some weird shit i walked in his room last night he was waving his hard dick around hitting shit yellin cock fight
Have you ever stopped and thought "I do NOT want to be inside of this person right now. Or ever." Because you should.
If I get a 4.0 I am doing SO much cocaine.
You left me a drunk voicemail of you describing your pizza to me at 2 AM
If they start to date again I refuse to help her sext him. Helping my mom sext my dad is where I draw the line.
Omg I got up from his bed and almost did a header into the wall because I came so many times I forgot how to walk.
I accidentally just texted my dad asking if he wants to do shrooms with me. Do I leave the city now or...
I told him he had to put his dick inside of me at approx 1159 to ensure it was birthday sex. i was 19 when he entered me.. came out 20. winning.
She then told me, and I quote "I want to send you nudes just to see how you'd react."
Randomize
