i've counted 4 condom wrappers but only 3 condoms. not again.
i feel like someone uncorked me like a wine bottle and pulled a living animal outta my arse.
I sent him a pic of my tits.. All he said was, "oh your sun burn"
he offered to walk down from the bar this morning to my house and bring me a guinness...
how romantic. its the irish mans version of flowers
her night didn't end so well, both of her boyfriends got arrested... together.
We were gonna play Truth or Dare but like 10 minutes in we decided to get naked and play Dare or Get the fuck out.
If you're fucking that other dude, I'll take the sloppy seconds. I don't care.
If that's all it takes to cure your hangovers then you need to drink more.
I just watch that 70s show all day and blaze whenever they do. It's nice being part of the circle
He's basically me if I was an 8-yr-old boy. It's like looking into a pudgy terrifying mirror
Ill go to bed but tamed sharks isnt so much of a bad idea. Not for riding
You came running into my room at 4 in the morning yelling "SANCTUARY!" and flung yourself into bed.
Hmmm, sounds like a Jaeger night then. Did I at least get to be the little spoon?
Oh my god. We just got locked out of our cabin and went to the neighbor's to see if they had a key and caught the neighbor jerking it. My night > your night
i just remember that i was on top of him and he wasnt contributing to the event much.. god i hope he wasnt asleap.
Woke up with a glow stick in my boobs this morning. Must've dominated Sunday.
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