I walked out of the bathroom and both of you girls were giving the gay guy head. I was like, "laaaterrr."
So I'm driving and this guy next to me at the stop light is reving his engine and honking at me. Motherfucker thinks that's because I'm asian and drive a honda I'm automatically going to race him
Her boobs more than make up for all the flaws with her personality.
bro i finally banged her last night on our basement couch
I'm at this frat party right now and yelled "my little 16 year old brother finally lost his virginity." They gave you a standing ovation
He said his penis was a 1 woman penis with a conscience an I was that woman...technically a declaration of commitment rite?
Dude I'm looking through my old high school year book and I circled every girl I fucked.. what was wrong with me.
I will be sticking my dick in something this weekend. You can either be that something or not. Your decision.
I draw, I play three woodwind instruments, I press buttons for eight hours at work and Im studying to be a gynecologist... I guarantee I can make you squirt, babe.
dude...i punched my best friend in the face, broke up with my girlfriend, and shit my pants.......now i don't know which one to take care of first.
I'm starting to think that Cosmic Steve ripped me off
He plays guitar, sings like an angel, and acts like a gentleman. If I don't fuck him by the end of first semester, I'm dropping out
After he finished he laid there and told me how much work that just was. I looked at him and told him not to ruin a good thing by opening his mouth.
Probably going to live on vodka sodas and fireball shots
I'm really interested in the size of his penis so report back on that one
The guy next to me on the bus has one hole in his jeans that has over 20 mini dicks drawn on his leg. Classic.
Randomize