I always see him when I'm wearing my ripped pants. I think its because of the hole in the crotch. My vag sends out supersonic "I'm horny" waves to him. Otherwise the calls are muffled.
We may have a problem that even dr. phil cant solve
is it weird that i blow-dry my hair and poop at the same time?
not any weirder than you telling me this at 4 in the morning
Miss Michigan hasn't even been Miss USA for 24hrs and already stripper pole pics are surfacing. Classy.
What's a "vodkaffle"?
It's where she puts vodka in the waffle mix.
You know, it doesn't really count as a walk of shame if you guys showered together the next morning
I bought a dress specifically for face plant durability... this is how serious I am about my drunk status this weekend
The bet was for naked jumping jacks. And it back fired, she just laughed at all the slapping noise.
He was having Sex and you yelled 'hot and dangerous!" and he responded with "if you're one of us then roll with us!" when he went to he bathroom I saw her getting dressed, looking mortified.
ever since I turned 21 the mother-daughter bonding sessions always end with whiskey and my little pony. I don't know why, it's just a thing that happens
He left weed in my bong for me this morning. What a guy.
We're going to ride the bus of mixed signals all the way to unrequited love town and that's where I'm going to live my life and then die.
That's actually very serious....I really do think of you whenever is see pizza
I kept falling all over the place and yelled at the bouncer you can't kick me out I'm from Texas.
He has me blocked on facebook.... so I stalked him using my cats fan page.
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