omg. he's a virgin strip club employee who's going to college on a ping pong scholarship. this is unreal.
i don't really know how much tequila is too much
Can I have my ID back now or are you using it to crossdress again?
I had my first sober conversation with his roommate. I remembered half way through that the first time we met I was getting fucked on his counter
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Is it wrong that I want to take the baby bump in her facebook pictures as "meal-ticket"?
I have your shoes, your bike, and someones blue underwear. Round 2 tonight?
My pussy is making all kinds of justifications that my mind would have no patience for if it was still in charge
We opted you as the sacrificial dick tonight. We need our patron cafe. Go make some moves.
My worst fear almost came to light...I was choking and the cats stared at me like they had no problem eating my face if I died
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I just got invited to party with a bunch of elderly lesbians I am in no position to offer life advice
sigh, if only his dick was as big as his mouth
I'm potentially being cockblocked by Old Man Winter. What the fuck did I do to piss off an entire season?
Not a problem, sailor. I speak both autocorrect and typo.
Just got recognized as black out drunk girl. I'm never going to live that down, am I?
Going to the eye doctors drunk makes you feel like your doing a sobriety test! They have to know..
Randomize