I've blown a few things in my day
I just did something awful... i just had to tell someone... i just used my brothers electric face cleaner as a vibrator
Immaculate conception is definitely the most boring way to conceive a child.
I just masterbated while imagining him getting hit by a truck. I have hit a completely unacceptable level of anger & bitterness. Help.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He just brought me a wine glass. Full of Tequila. Ignore any texts after this one.
he told me he expects me to keep the fangs on when i go down on him. presumptuous, yes, but man after my own heart.
I literally recorded a toilet flushing to make it his ringtone to remind me what a piece of shit he is
Kegstand on crutches, you need to get on my level.
WHO INVENTED HANGOVERS WHERE ARE MY CLOTHES
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
can we for just one second remember that I played with a homeless man's rat at st marks?
you threw me on the ground pryed my purse out of my hands screaming " I JUST WANNA HOLD IT A LITTLE BIT". later i found you putting on my lip gloss.
You continued to run around saying "free the nipple" while "taste testing" every liquor on the premises.
He told me that he'd ride his snowmobile from Cincinnati to Toledo in this blizzard just so I could give him head.
My new roommate looks like a troll. Or a serial killer. So if I disappear, show this text to the cops.
Just come here quick. I'm home in 3min. It will take you literally less than 5 to walk. Then 2 to undress, 16 to fuck, 2 to dress again and 5 to walk back..!!
exactly 16 eh??
Randomize