I wanna bring you to show and tell
Dude, I'm in her bathroom and there's crab shampoo... is it worth the risk?
You're missing what this discovery implies... she's got a fucking bush.
I wish there were wingman of the year awards.
FUCK TREES I CLIMB BUOYS MOTHERFUCKER
STOP listening to that song
watching a depressing episode of spongebob while high is the most depressing thing i have ever experienced
Why does everyone think all I do is drink? I go to class on wednesdays
No more Irish car bombs ever.
I envy you so much. I get girls who pee on my floor and you get girls who leave in the middle of the night
Green mimosas i think yes
I just saw her take the entire bowl of lime wedges from the bar and pour them all in her purse, and now using the empty bowl as a hat. Waiting for security to come and throw her ass out.
I want to own their dicks and all the attachments
I hate having to put a bra on before I go home cuz I have to pretend I actually went to class today
You better keep a close eye on your uterus tonight cause I am looking good.
Welcome to Missouri, the show me your genitals state.
I woke up in a limo in long Island, Ny this morning. Talk about a black out
I just talked comic books with a cop. We high-fived as he was running my name.
Proud of you.
We discussed the legality of being a vigilante. I won.
Randomize
