No. You are not the Kate in this relationship. I will do what I want.
you woke up and yelled "the tv is moving" and fell on the floor and passed back out
Did you pluck my eyebrows one night when I passed out?
This escort grabbed my boyfriends ass and it became clear, he fucked pretty much anything he could find prior to dating me.
What did I eat last night that was bloody?
I think their strategy was based on people bein at a beach, seein a rainbow, and havin an orgasm at the same time.
Just realized I left my heels in their microwave. Whoops.
It's never too late to be topless.
Exact words that were just spoken as she was on her 6th, yes 6th piece of bread: "I'm only eating the soft and chewy inside of the bread-I am taking the crust home to feed my turtles"
Remember that time you came over to my house and I was on the porch naked and eating peanut butter?
Are you coming to class or was the dick pic this morning your way of saying not today?
It only takes one line of cocaine, and you try to shotput a fucking kitchen table
I'm just going to assume my unresponsive booty calls are just preparing for the women's march tomorrow
I forgot to respond before, I was apologizing for confusing sex with secret Santa.
I'm eating dinner with his parents and my phone goes "MOVE BITCH GET OUT THE WAY!" Thanks.
Randomize
