you made cement angels. it was a great sight.
when i was ordering pizza, the guy muffled the phone but i could clearly hear him say "its that drunk bitch again"
I'm pretty sure I saw a man standing on a table with no shirt on getting sugar thrown at him while "pour some sugar on me" blaring while the cops were in the house.
I came home to burning cookies and him outside "tanning" naked.
He just wants an even tan
They better compete for your attention. Dual to the fuck
siamese drinking twins saturday is a go ... bring duct tape.
I always ask when they're due. It's the nicest way for me to let her know the rest of the world can tell she's putting on weight too
But I do know they give away thousands and thousands in booze
My liver has a boner
You told me my blanket felt like ground beef.
We decided it was acceptable to walk out of class on a quest for Doritos. That high.
Typing up notes at the bar and doing shots with the bartender until close on a Wednesday. This is what my second year of law school has become.
I really shouldn't have to tell you to stop banging your lightsaber on everything while we are in college.
so getting blacked out last night has made my lips so beautifully red for pictures today... and they say nothing good comes from alcohol
Beer Olympics must happen in honor of the legit Olympics.
Just opened my sisters laptop to "cute places to lose my virginity" googled last
Randomize
