i just smoke outta the biggest bowl i've ever seen. the kid was totally compensating for a tiny weeenie.
what is college for if not random hookup sex?
learning.
i would literally fuck learning if i could.
Good luck! Who knows he might be a stallion in the bedroom! or it could be like having sex with a crayon.
we hooked up on one of my student's desks last night...i can't decide if i'm ashamed or massively proud of myself
dude you teach first grade wtf
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you do realize eating doritos and gatorade as a breakfast hangover cure is only acceptable for one more month - then we have to grow up
I told him he didn't want "flip-flop extraction" on his medical history.
Walking down the street trying to find the pants I had on last night
He's not so smart and obsessed with sex and lacks listening comprehension skills. I feel like i'm dating a sexually competent sesame street character.
I can feel the judgmental stares of Christians from around the world right now.
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That night just went downhill after you pissed yourself while sitting on my lap
I just got his Save the Dave and, to answer your next question, NO I AM NOT GOING TO THE WEDDING OF THE GUY WHO GOT DRUNK AND CAME ON MY CHEST.
There's literally not a single picture of him with a shirt on. I can't talk to him without dislocating my eye balls.
Do not confuse my plans for being an adult though. I will ABSOLUTELY be practicing suturing, on my porch, while getting stoned.
he was really really nice, and I did coke off of his dong that night too
She swallowed the car key because she thought we were really going to make her drive.
Randomize