How long until YT realizes that it's a man?
I remember asking you "need some dick tonite?"
Yeah I guess to me frat party equals penis party. oh the wonders of vodka.
you scanned your fake to get into the dorm last night and when the lady told you it was the wrong card you looked at her and said this is who i am thursday night
Oh shit. Easter I forgot. Maybe we should leave the illegal stuff for when Jesus is less present.
everytime someone would look at you, you started to try and deep throat your beer bottle.
My dealer threw in a "freestyle rap" today with my purchase. I dont know if I can handle this relationship.
there were staples in my comforter. what kind of sex did we even have?
i feel like pizza bites are my only friend right now
My number one goal in life is to find out who can fill a keg with Popov
What's the best way to say, "it's too early in our relationship to leave me at your place alone"? Steal something?
Asking the homeless man what buss shelter is the warmest was not a good idea
So last night I kicked a beer can off of a frat guys head and it nailed one of my sisters in the face. Think i'll be brought up on standards?
How's my sex life is me mastubating next to her dog. that's how it's going.
Yeah so then I used the selfie stick his mom gave me to take nudes
He was fingering me and I came so hard that I actually broke his wrist. We're at the ER now.
Randomize
