I had a dream last night that we were eating cake at Mercy...hahaha. I'm furious I didn't see you.
I think about you every night.
I'm sorry.
I just encouraged Kelsey to make out with some guy for beer so I could take one, does this make me a pimp?
By definition I think it does.
So this is what it feels like to be all that is man.
He told me he had never done that before...I responded with "clearly"
the bulge in his pants is not junk. its hair. trust.
If she wasn't my friend I'd think she was a huge slut
I just had my first experience getting hit on by a guy. It was really awkward, he touched my chest and invited me to a gay bar because "women get drunk and let their guard down at gay bars"
thats actually pretty good logic
this is the second time in my life i thought i might need to go to rehab. im including all the mornings that i wake up in dewey beach as "the first time"
I'm starting to second guess shaving my vagina over the kitchen sink. The lighting is so much better though.
Do you think drinking vodka, rum and sourpuss out of a water bottle, in a class that isn't even mine rude?
He got a slutty, ugly mother of a 7 year old, and I got a dog that only sleeps and shits on clean clothes. No one won in this break up.
he calls himself the gay cupid because he matches two guys looking to hookup on craigstlist with each other. get me out of here. please.
I knew it was going to be a good night when my mom said "Have fun, be safe...wait, do you need any weed for tonight?"
Success! We fucked roommates!
MY GUT IS TELLING ME YES AND SO IS MY VAGINA
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