There's a dildo in the cheerios box here...
I just pynch a tree in the face
only you would photoshop your dick
she keeps a pillow, blanket, and a pack of saltines under the bathroom sink, for "rough nights".
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I can't really talk right now. I'm getting on a plane to Oregon to go give a guy a bj. I'll see you in three days.
Being the adderall dealer on campus, I feel responsible for everyone graduating.
I just looked at the guy in the car next to me and he was wearing a divers mask. We just nodded cause we both understood.
I went full Overly Attached Girlfriend. You never go full OAG.
Looked like a bag of smashed assholes and smelt like a brewery - still got morning sex. Marriage rules sometimes!
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Btw had an awesome time last night. Found some blood on my shirt and ear but I'll chalk it up to the tequila shots.
Below this exterior of ice is a layer of cum. Followed by a pool of gin. More cum. Then, finally a heart.
You passed out in your dogs bed and you only willingly woke up because I told there was a bottle of vodka and a snickers bar waiting for you upstairs
I HAD TO TAKE A SHOT OF JAGER AND SOME REDBULL JUST TO SEE IF IT’LL MAKE MY MOUTH FEEL BETTER
Would you paint my ceiling for oral sex?
Relationship goals: we both wore red underwear tonight. Except he won’t know because my bra been off but it’s the thought that counts I guess.
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