did it hurt when the cum got in your eye
not so much hurt, more like a stinging sinsation like mouthwash
a hangover this bad deserves a feeding tube
so I think I'm done having sex with her, she's way too crazy
what about the blowjobs for adderall?
no those are still okay
I'm in the dining hall. that same guy is here again, the one who sits alone and talks to his silverware.
It was like a secret agent hookup. No names, swift execution, get in- get out.
There I was staring at a teeny weeny black one and a huge white one. It was like an episode of Myth Busters
I think my new low is running outside in a towel to pet a particularly fluffy looking squirrel and projectile vomiting off the balcony.
College has taught me that the "best idea" is rarely the fun one.
This is true but you can't really get fired from college
Nothing like moscato in your sinuses tobmake your night complete
Dude, I think shitting blood should be a cause for concern not celebration that you had a great night.
Well I think I made it pretty obvious I wasn't in to it. I was drinking a beer while he was going down in me
i'm about to be the still-drunkest person on the ellipticals
I'll get him an axe as a present. So he can break out of his closet. That axe being my penis.
Me hangover (as projected). That sounds like a plan. Ill do it for Mexico
Please tell me I made it home with both shoes on
Nope
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