I'm gonna do things to you that will make the neighbors want to move.
Was it cool?
About as cool as only getting a handjob on your honeymoon.
im too high. i could barely wash my hair, let alone handle a whole shower
I want to fuck you on the side of the bed tonight.
babe, don't say it like that!
I'm sorry, I want to penetrate you on the edge of our sleeping quarters this evening.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Imagine the time you most wanted to kill yourself. Now add a room full of jail bait and no booze. Multiply that by a million.
I feel like today should be a " im going to have sex with you cause its raining and theres nothing else to do" kinda day
Yes I have a handle on life. A handle of Svedka.
I will pray to the gods of eye bleach for you
You need to fuck him. The man has his own Wikipedia.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I don't listen when you talk. I just try to find new creative ways to get you to send me naked pictures.
That's right. I did.
You are the saddest 25 year old gay man I've ever had the displeasure of knowing.
I vaguely remember a drunken mid sex pinky promise to not let it get weird.
I should be trashily making out with an air force cadet in the beach volleyball court by now
Please note that in response to your post about your dog's jaws clamped hard around a stick, I did not comment, "Takes after his dad." You're welcome.
I wore the clothes I got arrested in last night to work today.....there is no where but up from here!
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