Dear man in the lobby please go play whith yourself elsewhere
we drove through mcdonalds and ordered everything on the dollar menu. We told the workers that were making Super Size Me 2, drove away without paying and told them to bill our producer.
i would eat my own dick if it were covered in nutella
Just because he's a soilder doesn't mean his dick is a hero.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Drunk wheelbarrow races might make the top 10 list of dumb shit weve done. Especially considering all the broken glass around...
My diabetic professor who apparently didn't eat anything all day keeps passing out. I gave him a joint. He's gonna be fine.
She really is something else.
Words cannot describe what though. The best way to describe her is to say it like watching a bear and a whale have sex. You don't know why it's happening or how. But it's rather funny and you can't look away.
The fact that you think I have a life is so flattering to me.
After you passed out we took your car to the campus and stole a 150lb plaque that's now in your trunk. Happy birthday!
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm glad your nude photos turned out "classy" but you cannot hang them in the living room.
He wore the same cologne as my orthodontist so all I could think about was how I hadn't worn my retainer in months
when I was walking home I wad so excited to see a cat on the sidewalk but it was really a traffic cone
I am at 99 matches in less than 24 hours, I need a tinder rehab program
Humming the Indiana Jones theme song as my hand makes its way to his dick.
I’m going down on him like an Oompah Loompah on roller skates.
That makes no sense, but good luck
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