He had some BAD nuttage
Nuttage?
It's like cleavage......... but different
Dear everyone. As mark stated i did the 'piss n run' last night. This is all new to me and it scares me. Again, sorry. "if i could turn back time" -cher
if three guys were standing in front of you and they differed only in the hairiness of the groin who would you choose: smooth as a baby's bottom, the grass lands or the amazon jungle?
i think you're getting too neurotic about why she won't touch you.
so then you were screaming "GIVE ME KELVINS!" and heating things up in the microwave and no one knew what you wanted
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once i realized i was actively trying to drink the beer i was sweating out of my body i knew it was time to go to bed
Not sure. We'll pass out on that bridge when we stumble to it.
I think he offered to cook me dinner or cook me for dinner. Not really sure. Just smiled and nodded.
I woke up spooning with a broom that someone taped a mustache too..i need to stop starting my nights by drinking "hangover" wine.
I swear that when we jog in the morning I can hear it slap between his thighs
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I went to the bar without a bra on pretty sure you can go to Taco Bell drive thru with no pants
You were carrying a 6 ft lamp that we stole on your back yelling "OHANA MEANS FAMILY AND FAMILY MEANS NOBODY GETS LEFT BEHIND"
I had a meltdown and you quoted Puddle of Mudd to me
You need to stop telling people you gained weight over the holidays. You've been fat since July.
we will now reference it as "the infamous double dick night"
I am available for nakedness
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