Hands down the best time I've ever had barfing.
I've spent 9 hours vomitting in the fetal position... how did i stay like this for 9 months?
Anyone who says sunshine brings happyness has never woken up with the worst hangover of their life to their window being open and it being a bright shinny day
I just realized I'm gonna get paid at midnight on New Years Eve. That could be dangerous.
Even though he is humpbacked he is really good in bed.
I can see why you broke up with her now... it was like having sex with a corpse.
im probably shirtless right now with a bottle of jack watching horton hears a who. this is a judgement free zone.
I woke up with her little sister yelling "she's dead !!" from the bathroom doorway.
I just drank til 6am then boned a 32 yr old that looks exactly like ET. Oh god.
OMG OMG OMG DID YOU KNOW THERE ARE MINI CHOCOLATE COWBOY HATS THAT MEN CAN BUY FOR THEIR PENISES?
I was scared that I should know him but I was too busy blacking out to remember
So immediately after we finished having sex she started singing, "The Circle of Life", put her clothes on and then just left. I think I'm in love.
How bad is it I'm looking at his cock while waiting to see my therapist?
This should be illegal
It is
I mean more illegal... I shouldn't have this
That ass isn’t going to eat itself.
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