Ok so serious question: if one wanted to say the plural of mongoose, would it be mongooses or mongeese?
Your my favorite hello and hardest goodbye.
And I especially mean that last part, half the time you pass out somewhere and it is impossible to get you to leave.
Oh my god! She wrote the word ''hi'' in HAIR on the shower wall. What the fuck?!
I also tried to drunkenly adopt a kitten last night. It didn't pan out.
And then we were riding the keg in the pool like an 8 second rodeo...naked.
Just had a talk about safe sex with my mom. Not about protection. About the very real possibility of a "penile fracture". Gotta love having a nurse for a mother.
People don't tend to fuck with you when they think you have someone else's blood on your face
Also, sorry about chilling in just the towel last night. You know I have ADD and somehow even after looking at you, I forgot I'm not the only person living there right now
I work nights. I sleep in. I take online classes. And fuck bad bitches. I'd say those are some perks to grad school.
He says we're "annoying" but that's an odd word to describe a couple of heroic liquor saiyans
We don't know where he is but he left his pants and what appears to be a tooth here so he's gotta come back sometime
I fucked him on my yoga mat. Then we wake and baked and ate granola. So yes, you could say I found my center.
Never thought having a box of Cheerios could get me laid. My new lucky charm hello girl in 2B
I called 911 when they kicked me out of the bar last night.
One day, I might be old and married wishing I could bang everyone... and that'll be a problem. So I feel in my heart it's something I need to do.