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• (225): View more from Louisiana

  Dont touch anything! You just got rid of your crabs!

  Fav 1 843 1260

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• (607): View more from New York

  I've blown a few things in my day

  Fav 9 3115 793

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• (701): View more from North Dakota

  I call biggest shit show at the party. I welcome all challengers.

  Fav 9 3760 968

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• (512): View more from Texas

  Currently standing on top of my parents leather couch with no pants on playing helicoptor with my penis. You?

  Fav 26 7726 1692

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  If You’re Hot, It’s Easier For You To Do These 27 Things

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• (209): View more from California

  Responsibility does not care about your dick.

  Fav 10 3751 1433

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• (716): View more from New York

  ive come to the point where weve hung out more times sober than drunk. i think im growing up. fuck.

  Fav 7 1736 2965

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• (619): View more from California

  It took 5 minutes to find my bra.. in his car.

  Fav 3 3079 1004

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• (517): View more from Michigan

  I'm doing this for my boobs. They miss him.

  Fav 5 3091 899

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• (613): View more from Ontario

  Drunk me thinks I can light up a cig anywhere, sober me finds this hilarious and highly irresponsible. The grocery store is not a bar.

  Fav 12 3046 1253

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  23 Struggles Kids These Days Will Never Know

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• (937): View more from Ohio

  The girl beside me at the laundromat is bitching a guy out on the phone for jizzing on her bedspread. She had to use a triple machine to wash it.

  Fav 9 2769 1136

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• (770): View more from Georgia

  I just had to explain to my 62 year old advisor what "tea-bagging" was in the middle of her lecture. I smell extra credit. And maybe a demonstration.

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• (727): View more from Florida

  Tequila is gods way of telling you don't fuck with tequila

  Fav 5 1126 556

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• (440): View more from Ohio

  Possibly having a threesome with my ex boyfriend and his current girlfriend was great closure on that subject

  Fav 2 882 532

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• (262): View more from Wisconsin

  Some nice lady just gave me a beer out of her purse. I love youth hockey

  Fav 1 976 668

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• (850): View more from Florida

  Alex I've come up with a new medical condition. dick depression. it's a real thing and I have it

  Fav 3 253 291

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