I had to get a ride home from that girl that slept with 3/4 of the band
wicked high...have munchies. cherry flavor lube. problem solved.
I wouldnt endorse that guy if he was walking in a walkathon to raise money for a disease i had
apparently "my dealer got arrested" is not an acceptable answer when mom asks "What happened? You look sad today"
Exactly. wat kind of friend would i be if i even pretended to give a shit about ur problems
my coworker just texted me asking if i remember pissing in the mop bucket at the gas station
i think he saw me take a picture of his dick
YOU RECOMMENDED ME TO THIS GIRL BECAUSE SHES A STRIPPER AND YOU KNOW MY WEAKNESS FOR STRIPPERS WITH CHILDREN.
Pants-less sunday? Also I'm high and independence day is making me cry
im coming over
I'm getting a car wash man. I am go get a car wash high.
At a point I was just cumming dust last night
he won't tell me his last name, but I know his garage key code
I aimed for bossy but it came out slutty
i think i just naturally attract stoners
Oh and it’s been a year according to my snap chat memories since I banged your cousin in your sons truck pulled over on Elm St! 😂😂😂😬😳😇
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