I woke up and she had breakfast in bed for me
RUN RUN RUN RUN
I've been emailing with a woman. I don't think she's into me, but we've become sorta email buddies. I'm hoping to meet her because on her profile she states she's into 'fisting.' Frankly the thought kinda freaks me out but I'm dying to see what kind of woman is 1) into that and 2) admits it upfront.
we better have passed that bar exam - i dont want to have to drink like this again
someone just sent me a bong wrapped in christmas paper in the mail. signed 'santa'.
Drunk puking in my bathtub has plugged it up for the third time this year. I hate these calls to my landlord.
Turns out he's old enough to be my dad. I'm so excited. I've never had a sugar daddy before. What should I ask for first!? Want anything?
I think we need to have a day of drinking in classes. I know we don't share any, but sacrifices need to be made.
I'm ready to sell my soul to the strip club tonight
all a girl really needs is a few good pair of leggings and a drug dealer that delivers.
I think I've been there, but who knows? I drink a lot
Nothing says "back to school" like walking in the first day with a hangover
I think the only option is to smoke so much weed I just pass out for 3 days.
I've realized that drinking at your apartment alone on a Tuesday probably isn't a good thing.
There was puke outside of my classroom and lecture was half empty. Damn thirsty thursday is intense
Really should've known 2020 was gonna suck when the guy dressed as baby new year got arrested at our party 5 past midnight...
Randomize
