fml, blew my nose and red sprinkles came out and did the splits when i sneezed
The Redheads category on Pornhub is my number 2 site behind facebook on google chrome. I think I have a problem
I have two girls sleeping in my bed naked and I ended up making it to class, what were you saying about staying in on the weekdays?
Change your flight to Denver. That's where my penis is.
it wasn't THAT bad but he definitely called his dick an asshole and said sorry to my vagina
I didn't think it was possible, but that girl next door is even louder when drunk.
She gave him a lap dance on the glass table. You can guess how that ended
i'm already feeling the tequila hangover i'm going to have on friday
woke up this morning with a big mac and chips on a plate, coke in a glass and a knife and fork AND NAPKIN waiting for me in front of my computer. PORN WAS ALREADY PLAYING. I LOVE DRUNK ME
New development. Drinking at work is so easy and awesome I might have to do it everyday.
He tried to use a signal flare to light the bong
And?
He melted the stem
I'm so sick
I would imagine. You did most of your drinking for brazil last night.
That and I think I got food poisoning from sharing nachos with that homeless guy..
All I want is a guy who will love me and occasionally shave my balls.
Do you remember using the vicegrip to demonstrate how wide your penis is?
My dad is blowing up my phone with pictures from the midget wrestling match.
Randomize
